Blog — Robin D. Stone, LMHC
Robin Stone, LMHC, PLLC
Psychotherapist, Author, Speaker

Blog

Robin D. Stone is a New York City based psychotherapist, coach and consultant who works to help you achieve your most optimal self. 

Black History Without Borders
 

How celebrating our culture with a global lens can build resilience

To close out Black History Month, I’m focusing beyond our borders to highlight people and events in the wider African diaspora. A principle in my forthcoming book for Black women is global awareness and engagement. I believe global awareness is critical for our ability to heal and thrive in the world, especially in the face of racism. 

 One way to increase our awareness and experiences beyond the United States is to travel. Of course we are drawn to places where other Black people are and where we can indulge in cultural experiences and common personal interests. While we certainly should visit countries where we can relax and have fun, I want to encourage us to also use these opportunities to learn about the history, culture, and economies of places we visit.  

You don’t need to travel far to get a taste of different lifestyles and experiences. And you don’t have to blow your budget to do it. You can start by visiting an unfamiliar area in your home state or a neighboring state and being a tourist close to home before venturing further. 

 I recently had the opportunity to travel with family and friends to Europe. We spent most of our time in the Puglia region of Italy, which is known for its wonderful food and easy pace, as well as for its location on the map: in the “heel of the boot.” We adjusted to the local customs, eating our largest meal at lunchtime and having a light late-night dinner. We accompanied our innkeeper to town and shopped for one of our meals, picked herbs in the garden of the villa, and prepared a feast of homemade pasta, baked chicken, mozzarella, tomatoes and basil. Those of us who used the washing machine hung our clothes to dry as dryers are rare in much of the country. We ventured to the ancient town of Matera, where cave dwellings and churches are carved into the mountainside. We ate the freshest of foods and more gelato than I thought could be possible. And we walked. And walked. And walked.

 A hearty group of us ventured out most mornings around 7:30 to walk along a stretch of the ancient, unpaved road just outside our villa, Via Appia.  During one of our walks, we met an elderly Italian couple who were engaged in a pilgrimage to Jerusalem. They showed us their Italian guide book, which charted a path from Rome to Bari, on Italy’s southeastern coast.  From there pilgrims take a boat across the Adriatic Sea to Greece and then continue their walk. We later learned their pilgrimage was called Via Jerusalem, or Jerusalem Way. With help from Google translate, we were able to learn that they were walking along a path that was part of an experience for people interested in raising their spiritual awareness. I was fascinated by their journey; meeting them deepened my appreciation for the experiences of people in other parts of the world and for humanity as a whole. 

On the last morning of our stay, I ventured out on Via Appia for a solo walk. By the end of the week, the ancient dusty road was familiar and I felt a sense of peace and calm walking by myself. The late-summer sun was already high and the dew was dry. I began to wonder what it might have been like for my ancestors who might have traveled this same road. They might have been enslaved, as so many African ancestors were in all parts of the world. What might they think, seeing this modern group of Black travelers, venturing to this corner of the world, romping on the beaches, dining at the best restaurants, on their own volition, masters of themselves? Memories of those walks still brighten my heart and make me smile. 

 Whether you choose to travel to Black nations or those that are predominately White, it can be enlightening to think about the history of not just colonialism but also how Black people organized to liberate themselves and others. Throughout the Caribbean and Africa, there are rich histories of resistance and preservation of culture, language, and cuisines. Our ancestors were not just victims of colonialism but survivors who adapted and created and risked their lives to empower their people. Consider the Maroons, or African descendants of natives who escaped capture during the transatlantic slave trade to establish free societies in Jamaica and other parts of the Americas. 

 According to a recent report, by 2050, one in four people on the planet will be African. That’s an astounding statistic that reflects a seismic shift in population around the globe. Regardless of where you plan to travel next, take the time to do some research and find out about the experiences of Black and indigenous populations in your target destination. Where are the Black folks and how did they live? What contributions did they make to Latin America, Canada, the Middle East, and other parts of the globe? How are Black people living and transforming the cultures and economies today? 

While there are certainly stories of conflict and suffering in the world, you will also find expressions of deep pride and joy among Black people anywhere you visit. These global experiences can also serve as counterprogramming to all of the negativity about people of the African diaspora so commonly expressed in the West. 

Growing Your Global Awareness

In the book I am cowriting, I define global awareness and engagement as seeing the world through a Womanist lens. With openness and curiosity, Black women with a global mindset can work to understand a region’s culture, history, resources, economy, religions and challenges. Despite negative connotations associated with the idea of “globalism,” this broader perspective allows us to both see and respect other cultures and to secure our place at the table and in the world. I recommend the following ways to engage more deeply with the world, which will help promote our resilience and enhance mental health and well-being:

Start at home. Research the history of your town or city, particularly the lives and experiences of Black people. Your library and other cultural institutions like museums might offer insight. The website Historypin.org provides a forum for individuals to share photos and stories about their local communities. It includes a section about the Green Book, or a guide for African American road travelers during segregation. 

Expand your lens to the whole U.S. Our country is full of destinations with fascinating history. You could target major Black cultural institutions such as the National Museum of African American History and Culture in Washington, D.C., also known as the “Blacksonian”; the Schomburg Center for Research in Black Culture in Harlem; or the Black History Museum and Cultural Center of Virginia, among several others. Consider states you have yet to visit and do your research. 

Tap Black-owned travel resources. Founded by Zim Ugochukwu, Travel Noire is digital media company serving millennials of the African Diaspora. It offers travel news, recommendations for first-time international travelers, city guides, and a newsletter. Other sources of travel inspiration and information include Single Parents Who Travel, founded by intrepid traveler, writer and former #Essence colleague Tomika Anderson. Another source of inspiration is National Geographic’s Explorer in Residence Tara Roberts who chronicled her journey with Black scuba divers searching for slave shipwrecks in the “Into the Depths” podcast

Connect. Whether you travel in the United States or abroad, take the time to do research about local history and culture online or through travel companies. Once you are at your destination, make a point of talking to locals, from cab drivers to small business owners. Ask them about their backgrounds and lives. What do they think of current leadership and what’s happening in politics? Where do they vacation and why? Be willing to share details about yourself, with humility and respect for others.

Bring it home. In addition to photos and souvenirs, bring home a piece of your travel experience. It could be a piece of art or a book by a local author. These mementos will keep the experience and your global awareness alive. You can also write about your travels – impressions, surprises, favorite moments – while the memories are fresh in your mind in a special travel journal or notebook. 

Wherever you go, take your curiosity and cultural humility with you, and consider how each trip transforms your awareness of not just others but also yourself.

 
Collaboration: A Key to Effective Leadership
 

We’re at the top of the new year, but we’re just months away from another national election. This one will be critical to many of the issues that are important to women, and Black women in particular. We all vote as individuals, but an election also presents the opportunity to build community and work with others to get our favored candidates – local, state, and federal – over the finish line.

As we consider what candidates have to offer in the way of leadership qualities like integrity, accountability, and competence, we should also be mindful of an often underrated leadership quality – especially in this era of divisive politics – collaboration, or joining forces to empower and uplift. 

As I will share in an upcoming book that I am coauthoring about Black women and resilience, leadership is about influencing and guiding others to achieve a goal or fulfill a mission. Leaders are not just the CEOs and directors in an organization – individuals at all levels can demonstrate leadership. A collaborative leadership style that invites and listens to the voices and perspectives of everyone in a group can result in more creative and impactful solutions. 

Collaboration is an essential part of leadership. It is a quality embodied in the concept of servant leadership. An internet search brings up many definitions of servant leadership in different sectors of society, including business, the military, and religious institutions. I like this definition from Delta Sigma Theta Sorority’s Union County Alumni Chapter in North Carolina: “Servant leadership inverts the power pyramid and puts you at the bottom and others at the top. We must change our leadership focus to empowering others.”  

The idea of servant leadership resonates with many African Americans because we embrace the African-centered values of community and leadership. We can apply the concept of servant leadership to our lives when we vote, and also to how we show up at work or in our communities. In our jobs or as volunteers, we can cultivate a collaborative spirit. That means letting go of the old idea that leadership has to be top-down and embracing the notion that you might have to build consensus and compromise to lead effectively.

Collaboration is not always valued in mainstream spaces. Our country is built on an individualistic ethos, the idea that only a single visionary leader can guide a team to success. But we can actually be stronger and more effective when we join forces. As organizations from the NAACP to the Urban League know, there are benefits to linking arms, making connections and showing strength in numbers.


The good news is we can all be collaborative leaders. To determine your leadership style, take the Leadership Compass Self-Assessment. This tool provides a way of thinking about working with others, understanding the value of different work styles, and learning the qualities we can develop to become better leaders. 

Cultivating the Collaborative Leader in You

Grab your journal to write and reflect about leadership. Give yourself 15 minutes to consider and explore the following:

  1. Think of a leader who you admire. Name two or three qualities that you appreciate about how they connect, persuade and lead others.  

  2. Which of those qualities do you embody and which ones would you like to cultivate? 

  3. Imagine a situation where you see obstacles or roadblocks that keep you from leading in your career or your community. Then imagine those barriers were gone. Write about what you would do with nothing in your way.

Reflect: take a few minutes and read over what you wrote. Notice what feelings come up for you and where you feel them in your body. Consider any new action you might want to take as a result of your writing. And then write about that. 

As you explore how you want to show up as a leader, consider possible these action steps:

Volunteer to lead. Join a social-action oriented organization, or if you’re already in a group, raise your hand to lead a committee or take on solving a problem that the group faces.

Connect. Reach out to other organizations that do what you want to do in order to expand your reach.

Recognize good work in others. Foster collaboration by letting a colleague know that you see them and that what they’re doing matters. Send an appreciative email and copy higher ups, provide a letter or certificate of recognition, or simply buy them flowers. These acts of kindness foster collaboration by validating others in their efforts. It also makes them feel like they want to stay on your team.  

We are exploring collaboration and other principles in an upcoming virtual “Working While Black” series focused on leadership for Black women. Next sessions: authenticity on Feb. 21 and ditching doubts on March 6. For more information about future events, visit https://www.musegrace.com/ or get my newsletter here: http://eepurl.com/g9qkQ5